I can sum this book up in one word: AMAZING.
If you've read it, then you get it. It's an inside joke.
If you haven't read it, then you think I'm just a huge fan (which I am) and that I was highly impressed (which I was) and you might even be thinking, "is that all you've got?"
This is my first Gillian Flynn book, by the way, so I have nothing to compare her to, but I will say this: I like her style.
Yeah, I'm behind the 8-ball with this one, as is always the case with me, lately (although I did see "Jersey Boys" on it's actual theater release date just a few weeks ago). With so many books to read waiting on my shelves & in the Kindle, I resist the urge to buy something new (well, I resist the urge to buy something newly released - I am forever buying new books to read because I have absolutely no self control. None.).
So, back on track here: Gone Girl is an international sensation!, according to the book jacket. Released originally in 2012. Here I am, finally, 2 years later, picking up a copy in Kroger, of all places. See... I had just finished "Inside" by Charles L. Ross and I was looking for something next. I didn't feel like playing the Project 161 game (because it's more like Project 261 now) so I was lolling. Yeah, lolling along waiting for inspiration. Waiting for something to reach out and grab me. It finally hit a few weeks ago at the movie theater. Yep, you guessed it, I'm sure: I saw the trailer for Gone Girl: the movie. It was at the most, 2 days later, I had my very own copy of Gone Girl: the novel in my hands, thanks to a quick jaunt thru the local Kroger in search of Gatorade before driving an hour and a half away to watch my son (not) play baseball.
There's a bit of a backstory here: Thanks to Drew Peterson (remember him?), I've had this story idea running rampant through my head for quite some time: what if Peterson didn't kill his wife? What if she set him up & just left? And then: What would someone have to do to just disappear and why would they? What must be going on in their life to fake their own murder and frame someone else for it, specifically a spouse, someone you're supposed to love, honor, cherish all the rest of the days of your life? What kind of person would the spouse have to be? What kind of person would the fake victim have to be? How would they pull that off? Could they do it by themselves or would they have to enlist help? Questions, ponderences, theories, debates... churning this idea around in my head (apparently since 2007 because that's when Stacy Peterson disappeared), contemplating the scenario, mapping it out (my story involves a corrupt cop or district attorney, can't decide which, and the mob). And just as I was starting to really get my mojo going about it, when I'm mentally drafting an outline (could this idea really work?), I'm sitting in a darkened movie theater, waiting to watch something else - something my teenage son had decided was worth my hard-earned money and 2 hours of my time - when the trailer for Gone Girl: the movie comes on & I don't know why exactly, but something in those few moments of handsome Ben Affleck continually denying he killed his wife makes me think: Gillian Flynn beat me to it.
Damn.
And that's how I decided my next book would be Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn.
*SPOILER ALERT*SPOILER ALERT*SPOILER ALERT*SPOILER ALERT*SPOILER ALERT*
If you haven't read it, and want to, stop here. Because I'm going to spoil the mystery for you with this: Gillian Flynn DID beat me to it!
Damn.
Her story is so twisted, so convoluted, so mind boggling, so intriguing, so unexpected (even tho I was expecting that! What does that tell you???), that I could NOT wait to get on here and blog about it. I couldn't wait to get these jumbled thoughts down. By the way, I'm back to the drawing board with my corrupt cop/DA and mob idea cuz I'm realizing it is very, very small potatoes, very infantile, very juvenile. It's not connected, it's got too many holes I can't fill. I don't know enough about the intricacies of the legal system, mobsters, creating a new identity, challenges with escaping, being in hiding, fear of discovery, etc, etc, etc.
So, damn.
I'm intentionally NOT reading any other reviews right now. And, I'm ignoring the Reader's Group Guide in the back of my paperback copy (picked up in a Kroger - have I mentioned that enough???) because don't want to be influenced by anything else. I want to relish these moments of being gobsmacked by such a story, by such an interesting and brilliant writer's mind. I must know more about this Gillian Flynn, what else she writes, what makes her tick... Because she floored me. Yes, I am floored.
What Gillian Flynn has done is map out a perfect crime, where, egads!, the villan gets away with murder.
Oh, my!
But, aha!, Ms. Flynn, before you wallow too loftily in my adulation and admiration, I do have a few questions for you... Just some loose ends that I'd like to clear up, make sure I'm getting the full understanding. See the story is as much about Amy's calculating, devious mind and Nick's spineless backbone as it is about the investigation, about the bumbling fools of the local police force (and the FBI, apparently!) who can't successfully navigate a suspicious disappearance, probable kidnapping, potential death of a classic, textbook missing person (if there is such a thing as a classic, textbook missing person).
Because I'm sympathizing with the bumbling fools of cops, I'm gonna put on my Rhonda Boney Maroonie hat, if you don't mind, cuz Amy Elliott Dunne got away with murder, and defamation of character, and identity fraud, and malicious harassment, and false testimony, and..., well, all kinds of stuff! And I, as Rhonda Boney Maroonie, have too many unanswered questions that are gnawing at my usually-on-game-detective-brain.
So, Ms. Flynn, Amy's story, upon her return, is that she was kidnapped by Desi after he surprised her by dropping by the morning of her & Nick's 5th anniversary, correct? Around 10a, she said. He was driving the Jaguar, we know, because Amy said so and her hair - the long blonde ones - were found in the trunk. I'm wondering about where he parked while he was approaching Amy's house. On the street? In the driveway? Yes, yes, Amy did say he pulled into the garage and closed the door so he could load her into the trunk unseen (how very Drew Peterson of him!), but wasn't that after the struggle? Because he would have needed to get IN to the house to open the garage, so it's not as if he pulled up to her house & went straight into the garage, then lowered the door, then walked to the front door & knocked to be let in. No, if he had access to the garage before coming into the house, he would have probably come into the house thru the garage. Maybe in Missouri they have detached garages? Oh wait, but then he could have been seen leaving the house with a hog-tied Amy to get to the garage. No, the garage must be attached to the house with access from the house into the garage. So, back to my original question: where did Desi Collings park his car when he first approached the house to see Amy? In plain sight is my guess: the driveway, the street curb? Where his car, that Jaguar, would have, could have been seen. Especially by those nosy neighbors in the development - what were those names? Let me check my notes: oh, yeah, I have it right here: Noelle Hawthorne, Amy's very best friend in Carthage, and that guy, the drunk, that goes to The Bar alot, but calls when he can't - Carl. Carl Pelley. The one who saw the front door wide open and the cat - Bleeker! Oh, I love Bleeker! - outside. Strange, they, or any other neighbor, didn't notice a Jaguar in their 'hood. You know, with the economy and all. Seems like that would have stood out, been noticed.
Desi was busy in that house and it seems like a lot happened so this wasn't an in & out job. Oh, no. They struggled, remember? A struggle in the living room had to be staged (half true and half false, right?), the blood on the kitchen floor had to be mopped up, those pesky ornaments that topple over at the slightest vibration had to be set back up, AND, the Jaguar had to be moved into the garage... AND, Amy had to be hog-tied while she was unconscious. She was clubbed and stabbed in the kitchen, but she came to, hog-tied, in the living room... but... there was no blood in the living room. He must have dressed her wound, which is very noble of him, but then he did adore her, didn't he? Ah, let me get this straight: Amy claims, without rousing too much of the cops or the FBI's suspicion, that Desi surprised her, attacked her, stabbed her, dressed her wound well enough there was no blood in the living room or the trunk of his car, staged the struggle to look like more than it was, cleaned the blood off the kitchen floor, moved his car into the garage so he could load her into the trunk sight unseen, then flung open the front door and took off out of there! Oh, and he must have stopped, got out, lowered the garage door (but yet chose to fling the front door wide open... hmmm, why not just leave the garage door open?) behind him because no one mentioned the garage door being open. Desi did all that. In a rush. In a Jaguar. Unseen. Wow. He has perfect timing or incredibly good luck.
Of course, the police dusted for finger prints at the crime scene. Yes, they did whether you write so or not because that is standard police procedure, and even though Amy has painted the local police as bumbling fools, we do know and engage in standard police procedure. Textbook, right? So, here's the thing: Desi's prints weren't uncovered. Did Amy mention he wore gloves? I don't recall that. Wow, he was prepared, wasn't he? He must have walked in wearing them because we didn't find his prints on the door, which we know he handled if we believe her story: he forced his way in AND he flung it wide open before leaving. He touched the ornaments, he toppled the ottomon, he clubbed her with the puppet handle - which was found with Nick's prints, is that right? Nick's prints, but not Desi's because he wore gloves. Or, I do suppose he could have wiped down everything he touched, but in a struggle that is alot of stuff to account for, and it would mean wiping off all the prints. As in Nick's and Amy's. However, I suppose it could be done. There was alot of wiping down prints throughout Amy's side of the story.
Another thing that's troubling me, just a wee bit: Amy said Desi stabbed her with a pocketknife he was carrying. A pocketknife? Has Amy ever seen a pocketknife? The blades are folded into the handle and you have to pry them open. It's not exactly smooth & easy. You've got to get your nails in these little grooves and pull the blade out - and be careful not to stab yourself, or scrap yourself with the very sharp tip. But let's get back to Desi attacking Amy - clubbing her with the wooden handle of the Judy puppet - and then swiftly, because it does seem Amy's telling a story of things happening very violently and very fast, Desi is suddenly yielding a pocketknife, and he stabs her arm! I'm thinking: was it really a pocketknife? Maybe it was a switchblade! Those you just flick open, or you push a lever and the blade springs out - fast and smooth. No, she did say "pocketknife" so a pocketknife it must have been. You know, since she said she was dizzy, maybe he had a few moments there to pull out the blade of the pocketknife and then stab her. That must be what happened. By any chance, did someone check the scar from the knife to see if it was consistent with a pocketknife blade? No? What about a switchblade? No, not that, either? Well, what kind of blade does it seem it was? Oh, you don't know cuz none of the bumbling fool cops looked into that. Huh.
Jacqueline, Desi's mom - they are so close! - can she account for Desi's whereabouts on that infamous July morning, where at 10a Desi barged into Amy's house and attacked her? Well, not just that morning, but for those several days following when he had her blindfolded, drugged and gagged? Don't Desi & Jacqueline have lunch together every day? Wouldn't dear, doting, involved mother demand he account for his whereabouts those specific days, if he was unaccounted for? Those specific days when Amy was splashed relentlessly across the news - Mommy Dearest would have sought him out to discuss this, wouldn't she not? Jacqueline is so adamant that Amy murdered Desi, but she can't prove it. Why not? Why can't she dispel Amy's account of that morning? Has anyone checked to see where he was, what he was doing the day Amy disappeared (and don't forget the several days following)? He had no appointments, no meals with Mom - some decadent restaurant as they frequently dined! - he saw no one and no one saw him those several days that could trip up Amy's story? Oh, and WAIT! There are witnesses, there is an account of his whereabouts, at least one of those days: he showed up at the volunteer search center! So now Amy would have us believe he drove Amy somewhere, stashed her, left her in a motel, a cabin, or maybe an apartment, blindfolded-drugged-gagged, and came back to put on a farce about helping search for her? Probably to establish an alibi. Yes, that must be it. To establish an alibi for being in Carthage during the aftermath and not somewhere holed up with his kidnap victim.
Now, I've got to ask about the contents of the woodshed that Amy would have the police, and the world, believe was Nick's. All Nick's. That he bought it and he hid it from her there. So, my question is: Where'd all that stuff come from? Online shopping, right? Because if any of it was bought in a retail store then someone might remember a girl using a credit card in the name of Lance Nicholas Dunne. A very pretty girl. Actually, a beautiful girl. A memorable girl. So, it must have been online, which means... it was shipped, delivered, via US Mail, UPS or maybe FedEx. So. Delivered where? Their house? Nick, the fool, would have had that stuff, which he promptly hid from Amy to keep his secret life from her, to their house. Where Nick, with 2 jobs between the school and The Bar, rarely is and where Amy, the stay-at-home, non-working wife, would be the most likely person to receive it. Kinda blows that whole theory, doesn't it? Oh. He had it delivered to Go's? Or The Bar? Or the school? Or Andie's? Well, wherever it was delivered need not be a theory because that is verifiable. Cops have the credit card statements - the purchases on the statements match the contents of the shed. This, to me, is no-brainer, even for bumbling fool cops in po-dunk Carthage, Missouri.
Speaking of bumbling fool cops: did they seriously, really & truly, NOT have Nick tailed, constantly, immediately from the start? Really? REALLY?
And... there's the $12k car she bought off Craig's List... the one she moved regularly from different long term parking lots in St. Louis. Amy did think of everything, except... how'd she get to St. Louis "the day of" to get said car without being seen? She was still Amy Elliott Dunne then - her hair long & blonde. And she was beautiful, remember? Memorable. Surely someone noticed the beautiful woman traveling somehow - train, cab, bus, hitchhiking - to St. Louis. Within hours her face was plastered all over the news. No one came forward, tho. That's odd.
The Jeff & Greta twist... that's a good one! But, knowing Amy - now that we know the real Amy, the one who frames her husband for her own murder & destroys his credibility & shackles him to her for the rest of his life, who sets up her friend (her name is Hilary Handy, seriously? Like Amazing Amy and Sidekick Suzy and Able Andy... why not Handy Hilary? I actually thought, at first, that her name was a joke) to be a psycho Amy wannabe, and successfully creates a scene of date rape after being wronged by a beau, and who tracked down a trucker - literally tracked him down by his route and called repeatedly to lie about his driving so he'd be fired because he flipped her off once - that Amy - how is it we're to believe she would walk away from those two f-ing a-holes??? They robbed her, left her nothing - nothing! They foiled her plans! She could have still been on the run. She wouldn't have had to call Desi. Their greed ruined everything! Everything! She spent so much time putting that plan together, that perfect, perfect plan, and taking every little thing into consideration. She had to have been enraged, enraged!, and we know Amy cannot resist that rage. She has to act on it, she has to plot revenge - something so horrific that they will never, ever, get over, will never, ever forget, will never, ever allow them to not fear her for the rest of their lives! They will revere Amazing Amy. She has to win. She has to have the last word. Right? Isn't that who you gave us? So, (I "so" alot, I know), so, Gillian Flynn, how is it that Amy, the one we know - the true bitter & vengeful Amy, tucked her tail between her legs and simply, dolefully, just drove away? How, seriously how?, is that possible???
Thinking of those two... are we to believe that they would not come back into the picture, once the story broke - they wouldn't have thought they hit the motherlode? How much they could gain by threatening to expose her secret? Yeah, she accounts for that, somewhat, but the truth is, they could, and would, put a huge gaping hole in Amy's story - she was here! She was in this cabin! She played mini golf with us right there! We ate at this place! She touched this, and that, and that - and she was seen! Seen by us, seen by others. Seen with dark chopped hair & fake, clear lens glasses. And she watched Ellen Abbott relentlessly. She was obsessed with it - and she was alone. No man was with her. No, she wasn't tied up... yes, they could really, really hurt Amy's credibility. It could - it would - cast doubts. It would force the police to investigate, even if they did it without interest or enthusiasm. To pacify the two buffoons, they might have a sketch artist do a "take Amy's face and add some weight to it, cut her hair and make it brown, put glasses on her... is this who you saw, sir? Ma'am? Yes, that's her? Well, well, well..." Wouldn't that be a interesting turn of the screw? Yes, Amy, brilliant Amazing Amy, should be nervous about those two. She shouldn't expect them to just go away. She should be worried they'd show up at the worse possible moments - standing in line during her book tour. Outside the TV station waving thru the window during her on-air interview. They would need to be dealt with, eliminated, because those 2 - those 2 wouldn't stop at $8k when they knew they could get more. Much much more. They'd haunt her until they couldn't haunt her. So she'd have no choice. Not only had they wronged her but they could ruin everything AGAIN.
I suppose the thing, tho, I ponder the most (I'm still in Detective Rhonda Boney Maroonie mode) is the pregnancy. The real one. From the fertility center. Um, how'd she do that? I mean, I get that she did have the Center keep their specimen on hand - instead of having it disposed of (so dismissive!) she contacted them to keep it. BUT, then, at some point, she retrieved it. When? Within twenty weeks after her return, after her highly publicized and sensationalized return, she goes to the clinic to get inseminated? She waltzes in, by herself, to the clinic, to where the specimen is in her name and Nick's name, two recently notorious people, and says "hit me up!" Or should we think she got it somehow, way back when, and kept it somewhere? Like, in the freezer? Where do you keep things like that, I ask... And how do you fertilize yourself? No, I can't buy that one. I've got to go with her going to the clinic, announcing who she is, having herself inseminated without her husband by her side. There has got to be a record of that. Surely there is.
Ah... but what about this: could the baby be Desi's??? They had sex that very day before she returned. That very day! Before she drugged him and cut his throat. She had his semen inside her when she came back. Yes, so why couldn't the baby be Desi's? Oh, I know, that's not what Amy wanted - I'm thinking of Nick. Nick wanted out. He wanted a divorce. So why not accuse Amy of having an affair with Desi, of the 2 of them staging her disappearance & together framing Nick? Of planning it so carefully - from the artfully plotted fake journal to the stocked woodshed full of man-cave gear (which, of course, the police could check for FINGERPRINTS) to the "authentically staged" living room struggle scene - and then running away together, of hiding Amy at the lake house, where she was isolated, soon lonely, watching her story unfold, seeing Nick suffer, hearing his messages, understanding those inside jokes - and realizing she made a terrible, terrible mistake! But Desi wouldn't let her leave, he imprisoned her! She could prove his obsession - the tulips! The dusty rose paint! She had no choice but to drug him & kill him! Boney & Nick, together, could prove this scenario because they could have tracked the deliveries of the woodshed contents & proved it wasn't Nick, right? Just enough to cast suspicion, to put Amy in a bad light, to make that hole a little bit bigger. And Nick, dear sweet Nick, he wouldn't have the heart to desert Desi & Amy's baby - no, he wouldn't. He'd take that baby, while Amy rots in jail or in the nuthouse, and he'd raise it as his own.
Safe. Both of them safe. From Amazing Amy.
OK, Boney Maroonie hat off. I've got questions, yes, I do. It's these questions and many like it that put a halt to my own elaborate missing-wife-frame up outline. I know that Gillian Flynn's story is a good one, despite my picking at the holes and making them bigger. She's a talented writer, she has me intrigued, despite my vow (vow!) to quit buying more books until I've read some of the ones I've already got - that vow - I will be stopping by the bookstore today and picking up 2 more: Dark Places and Sharp Objects.
And I cannot wait to read them!
